Stillness or Drama

"...each of us has learned to get 

our emotional needs met 

by attaching to anything 

that gives us the illusion of power. 

Sometimes our attachments 

are to happiness and joy 

and sometimes our attachments 

are to shame and fear...

...Anger reflects a belief 

that we are not enough. 

When unable to express anger 

in a healthy manner, 

it can create symptoms 

that manifest 

as illness 

and damage relationships."

- John A. McMullin

Oh, ego.

The ego creates chaos.

It imagines scenarios that get us all riled up.

It helps us to create circumstances that require our fixing and involvement.

This keeps us busy and gives us the illusion of control.

If we're busy fixing and trying to control our circumstances we don't have time to be still and be nearer to our true self.



Our true self is the stillness of the now.

The starkness of the present moment.

The quiet of the vast openness of pure potential.



Who the hell wants pure potential

when you can have drama??



Drama gets those addict-brain-chemicals going.



Imagine every cliched movie image of a junkie finally getting their fix after a long jones.

That's how we are with our addictions to drama and chaos.



I did it this weekend.

I got myself so worked up over a situation that wasn't even real.

I took the evidence and ran with it. I made the most disempowering story out of it

one that made me feel ashamed, undeserving, abandoned and betrayed.

There was no substantial reason for me to feel any of those things.

My ego latched onto a way for me to relive the emotions of past hurts

rather than experience the situation as it was.

I indulged in ruminating and fretting.

Then when the situation was diffused, I felt a pang of,

"Hey, where did my chaos go?"

and I knew ego had got the better of me.



I don't strive to be egoless.

I like the drive ego gives me.

I like passion.

I just don't want to be ego's tool.

I'd rather not suffer as hard as I did over the weekend.



Well, I'm ahead of the game.

I see how I kicked myself around for no good reason.

Is there ever a good reason to kick one's self around?



Tomorrow I'm going to see Sifu Yee for a Tuina session.

I'll get the ego pummeled right out of me!





*Lisa's Video Pick of the Day*

Qi is real.

Qi is measurable.

This isn't Josh Rubin speaking, but he uploaded this video.

Josh says, "I feel that if he can do it, we can as well. It is about trusting oneself on all levels, mind, body and spirit. Once we have that, we can not only live through our physical body, but we can live through our mental, emotional and spiritual."

I have chills.

click here or click below